A Running Habit
Running for me is a habit: one that is key to how well I function, how effective I am in the world, and the quality of my relationships.
It is a habit that has been formed over twenty-five years: from a twelve-year old jogging up and down his street in the picturesque Highland village of Carr-bridge, to a thirty-seven year old running a 2.47 marathon in Edinburgh in 2024.
This series of blog posts looks at the benefits of building a running habit, before exploring how to build your own running habit.
Loneliness
About this time last year, I read ‘Together’ by the US surgeon general Vivek H Murthy. His central message in the book is that loneliness has become an epidemic across the world:
“Loneliness is the subjective feeling that you’re lacking the social connections you need. It can feel like being stranded, abandoned, or cut off from the people with whom you belong—even if you’re surrounded by other people. What’s missing when you’re lonely is the feeling of closeness, trust, and the affection of genuine friends, loved ones, and community.”
There are many reasons for the increase in loneliness in society: the impact of social media (which, of course, is anything but ‘social); the lingering impact of the pandemic; the fact that mobile phones have replaced much of our ‘normal’ social interaction.
Reading the book was a bit of a wake-up call for me on a personal level. I intuitively knew I hadn’t been giving some of my relationships the attention they deserved, or been proactive in looking to build new friendships. I would could come up with excuses for this: my main justification being having small children and having “no time.” I’m also a classic introvert, and fairly content in my own company, so I had told myself I didn’t need a huge social circle.
As Murthy highlights in his book, however, we all, no matter what our temperament, benefit immensely from social interactions.
One of his suggestions in the book is to try to proactively seek out people who might have similar interests to yourself. He also talks about your social muscle, and how we should take small steps to try to ‘work’ on building social connections.
That brings us to running…
Running Connections
If you are reading this blog, I’m imagining you have at least a passing interest in running, jogging or exercise. While I won’t claim that everyone around you will share that interest, I’m willing to guess that you will know at least one person who does.
Running can be a solitary activity. That, of course, is absolutely fine and much needed. But it can also be a shared social activity, one which can balance the positive energy of exercise with in person interaction.
Running with someone also gives time without the incessant demands of technology. As Murthy says, this is one way to combat loneliness: ““I’m putting technology aside—my phone, any social media, my inbox—and just focusing on the people in front of me.”
After reading Murthy’s book, I was reminded of how many of my friendships over the years have revolved around running. I decided to try to be proactive and stretch that social muscle, and set up a Dad’s running group in my local area. It would involve a four mile run, and a few social drinks after in the local pub.
I won’t pretend that this came easily to me: there is an element of vulnerability in putting yourself out there socially, and that comes with a fear of rejection.
Fast forward a year and we have run (and drunk too much beer) just about every Sunday night for a year. I’ve been lucky enough to meet a great group of people and form new friendships. We even managed a trip abroad to run the Malaga half marathon in December. I’d like to think that this group it has also had a positive impact on others.
Reach Out
You don’t need to start a running group to have a similar impact in your own life. Another of Murthy’s tips is to try to connect with someone socially each day. That reaching out can be done through running. There are of course logistical challenges to this, but even trying to arrange a run with someone once a week can be hugely beneficial.
Join a Group
Since starting a group, it’s been a great discovery to see just how many running groups are sprouting up all over the place. They can range from the more serious to the seriously social. Why not have a look in your local area and see if there are any groups you can join?
If you happen to be reading this in the Edinburgh area, I’m starting a new running group on Thursday the 4th of July in Cramond. The aim of this group is to hopefully include all types of runners and people – slightly more inclusive that the Dad and beer drinking Sunday nights!
There a few people helping me out with the coaching, so I’m really hoping this group can grow significantly and have an impact in building social connections and get more people interested in running. There will be runs for all all levels of runners: from beginners to people who want to get faster.
Again, I appreciate coming to such a group can be intimidating and requires a bit of social courage. What I can guarantee, however, is that just about everyone around you will feel the same. That literal step into a bit of the unknown, however, could result in you forming some new and energising social connections.
So, want to feel more socially connected? Go for a run with someone today!
Read: Vivek Murthy ‘Together’
Listen: ‘ Vivek Murthy’s podcast ‘House Calls’.
